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Ecclesiastes 4:12...a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

It was once said to me that if I sought ONLY to serve Jesus then stay single, but if I want to be LIKE Jesus, get married.

It amazes me as a married man, coming to know how swift The Lord responds to prayer when it pertains to the confines of marriage, as well as the ordering of my heart towards Him "relationally". Don’t get me wrong, The Lord answers other prayers at His time whether it be quick or delayed, not one genuine prayer goes denied. Yet when it comes to praying prayers, as both a redeemed son in Christ and a married man to my wife, asking for the Spirit’s inner working within my life to be more of the best in both areas I see God move quickly. I have come to believe that if one who is both saved and married sees a delay in God’s answering to prayer it may possibly be due to the fact that they lack the posture of covenant, which is the laying down of your own life. Some I know can be quick to pray for their spouse and almost seem to complain to God as Adam complained to Him in the beginning concerning Eve. How many know that after the first act of sin which being disobedience to God, the next problem was a marital one.

Do you know what and why God responds the most frequent to prayers concerning your fellowship with Him and marriage? It is because BOTH have to do with covenant! God will bless who and what He will bless, but ALWAYS will answer covenant prayers that were constructed in a way He established and joined together!

EVERYTHING God does when He responds, is ALWAYS on the basis of covenant! If our prayers don’t in one way or enough match up with His desire and confines of what covenant is and what it entails than it is possible for the answer to prayers be delayed. But covenant prayers, if you will, is God’s love language!

The Bible says in Mark 10:6-9 But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

When being confronted with a question about divorce, hoping to trip Jesus up in His answer, Jesus resorted back to the intent that has never been altered or changed in any way, concerning God’s view and definition of what marriage is. If Jesus was asked about any other form of marriage recognition, His reply is still the same as it was over two thousand years ago. In Jesus’ answer He confirms the fact as to why God hates divorce and also confirms the fact as to what genders are needed to be known as a marriage. It takes more than love, it takes the proper anatomy as far as God is concerned.

Marriage is a powerful covenant when God is the officiator and not just our feeling alone.


"For I hate divorce," says the LORD, the God of Israel, "and him who covers his garment with wrong," says the LORD of hosts. "So take heed to your spirit that you do not deal treacherously." Malachi 2:16 (NASB)

First off the marriage covenant represents an example of Christ and His Church (those who received Him) and His promise in saying He will never leave or forsake her. (Eph. 5:22-32, Heb. 13:5). To be a Christian and then divorcing your spouse is a slap in the face of Christ, making His word and promise to be demonstrated as a lie. …Let God be true, but every man a liar. (Romans 3:4). As for those who do not live for Christ and are married then divorce, well marriage is not a means of salvation nor God’s favor applied. In other words, sinners will do sinful things. We are not sinners because we sin, but we sin because we are sinners. However the good news is that God’s grace is made available to a repentant heart.


Think about it. According to God’s way and order for marriage, children are to be the fruit of the union and not the other way around. EVERYTHING that a married couple builds together when married is not just his or hers but it is theirs! EVERYTHING is a byproduct to the marriage!

Consider working for a company that grants you access to their company vehicles to use for BUSINESS ONLY trips or how that the company you work for may pay for your air fare, hotel and food for BUISNESS ONLY trips! Now this benefit only comes to you as often as you are involved in the COMPANY’s AFFAIRS which making you part of their business. Now what if you get fired? Do you get to still drive the new company cars or should you expect the company to pay for you to travel, lodge and eat? NO!!! why? Because since you were fired from being a contracted employee, you were also fired from all the perks that comes with the job!

MARRIAGE IS NOT A CONTRACT, IT’S A COVENANT! More important than you secular job, is the job you have to your spouse before The Lord! If you divorce your spouse saying “ I want nothing to do with this marriage” then what you do is you not only divorce your place in your spouse’s life, but you also divorce yourself from the perks or the benefits or all the byproducts of that very union. In other words your child now is left in the place to choose as to honor the departing parent/spouse, because one that leaves, not only leaves their place of covenant with mommy or daddy, but also leaves their place of authority as mommy or daddy! In other words, everything that is a byproduct of covenant is no longer yours if you decide to leave. You may read this and think this is unfair, but this is the very reason why marital covenant is such a heavy deal and why God hates divorce!


Thank God for His grace. I myself have personally sought the Lord years ago on this issue that I write and all I can say is that if it was not for His grace, I could very well be as any other kid out there being disrespectful, lost and hurt; but beyond the way I was raise as a child, it has been the posturing of God’s word and the accountability I hold to it that has continued to deepen the character and nature of Christ that I so desperately desire more of in my life. Coming at the price of dying to self and apprehending the power to live beyond myself, the grace of Christ brings all healing and wholeness as well as soundness and posture for righteousness.

Why did I choose to write this topic on the eve of a New Year? Well I believe there are many out there still dabbling with hurt within their marriage and perhaps have preconceived plans that in this new year they will leave their marriage and all that it came with.

Friend, let not this New Year be the reason for you to endeavor NEW ways outside of God’s way for your life. But rather let this NEW year be a RENEWAL of your covenant with Christ first and foremost, and then a commitment of a RENEWED VOW to your spouse as being your one and only and to your children that you will always seek to exemplify the nature of Christ and never leave or forsake.

I know some who love God and divorced and reasons vary; but my responsibility is to both preach and live what the Bible says. The Bible talks about adultery and if one being an unbeliever, and I encourage if anyone has any questions to search it out, but the point I want to make is not to divorce yourself from the blessings of The Lord!

Before my wife and I went downtown to get a marriage license, we went “uptown” figuratively speaking, in prayer first seeking God’s blessings of joining us together. Many others have done the same and yet expect though because they went downtown to get papers of divorce, they never went “uptown” to hear heavenly consent over the matter and expect God just moved along with them in new endeavors. Today some churches have “divorce” ministry where they acknowledge people to no longer be compatible and the whole church blesses of people as they go on their own way. Nothing could be further from the truth and a disgrace to the heart of Christ.

Stick it out, fight and live blameless before the Lord, don’t be another number in the status quo of divorce rates, but be a pioneer in that which is God brought together! The worse thing in life than failing, is quitting. Don’t quit, but let God be in control and His ever ending love flow. Only He can change the heart of people if we are willing to allow people to see the changed heart in us.

Psalm 103: 2 Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits:

​The Lord Bless

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